Friday, November 14, 2014

one hundred fifty over one hundred

my family has a history of breast cancer, kidney stones and diabetes.

so how on God's great earth am i borderline hypertensive?

i quit smoking, i haven't been drinking, i'm exercising, eating fruits and vegetables (which is not cheap, by the way.  explains why so many people prefer junk food), drinking tons of water and sleeping six to seven hours every day now, as opposed to the three hours on average that i used to get.  not to mention, i just finished a project, which means i have no reason to be stressed out.  can someone explain to me like i'm a four-year old WHY this is happening???

the explanation they gave to me, was that i was in pain - literally or figuratively? i've been trying to get someone to check my kidneys for a while and it doesn't make sense to me to be taking pain relievers when i'm not feeling any pain.  i don't want to be dependent on pain killers.  only addicts do that.  last i checked, i'm a workaholic.  and i've already explained that i'm not facing a huge amount of stress right now.

so what could be wrong?

***

i dreamt about you.   i dreamt about you talking to me because yours was the last voice i heard before going to bed.  sadly, it was just a dream.  i will never get any chance in hell like that with you.  you're too important and i am shit.