Thursday, March 31, 2011

if this is what i said, would i have had as much fun?

"There are always three speeches, for every one you actually gave. The one you practiced, the one you gave, and the one you wish you gave."
Dale Carnegie


almost everybody had a topic in mind but up until everyone was already delivering their presentations, i couldn't make up my mind about what i would do for mine. i just didn't. i had ideas in my head and i felt passionate about all of them. what to choose then?

then i thought: a day in the life of an executive assistant.

problem was how to apply what we have learned so far and where to begin. there was also the time constraint - you were only supposed to talk for five minutes. that includes the questions they would ask you in the middle of what you were talking about. kindly like what we had with debate, only we didn't have to argue with whoever asked the question.

extemporaneous is defined as carried out or performed with little or no preparation; impromptu. whenever i write, i speak from my mind. before i submit, i have a chance to proofread, see if i'm missing or talking too much about something. when i speak, whether i'm just with friends or speaking in front of a large audience, i have the idea in my head. but once i spew it out, i can't take it back. delivery is always a factor on whether what you will say is remarkable or enough to bury you under the ground.

i did okay the first time. i think. they said so. at least they understand now or have an idea of what i do or not do or what they make me do that's not part of my job description for a living. i talked about flirting for my fifteen minute presentation. who better to talk about flirting, right?

***
many of us are not aware but in our everyday lives we flirt. many of us have a negative perception of what flirting is. flirting is not just confined to finding a suitable mate. flirting is also used as a tool to get information or to get out of trouble. anything you do that builds some sort of connection with other human beings, whether with the same or opposite sex, can be categorized as flirting.

as stated by the experts, there are two types of flirting, there's the non-verbal flirting and then there's verbal flirting. non-verbal flirting can be expressed by smiling at your object of affection, smiling with your eyes (yes, the Tyra Banks way) accompanied by long stare. when one is all touchy-feely, he/she is also flirting.

then we have verbal flirting. when you are flirting with someone, you don't want to ask them questions that can be answered by just a simple "yes" or "no" or by just one word answers, the closed-ended questions. you want them to expound to stretch the conversation, that way you can be with them longer. you ask them open-ended questions, those that require them to explain or give more than just one answer. if you ask a closed-ended question, make sure to follow up with an open-ended question. you may also want to compliment the other person and be sincere when you do. it also helps to be polite. don't forget to smile.

more than anything, it helps if you just be yourself. now, if you don't like yourself then that's another story. we know we can't make people like us if we don't even like ourselves.

okay, now that i'm writing it down, i really can't remember half of what i said. i had a guide in my head. but that's the thing, what i said back there will always be different from what i have in my head now. i still have the same idea, but there are certain thoughts better read, some better said, some better left in your head.

it was a great experience, being in training again, meeting new people, learning more about them. it was also great learning more about me. maybe i'm a better speaker than i give myself credit for :)

i don't know. it's been a while and when you've gotten so used to your own parents not complimenting you, you get a little bit overwhelmed when other people praise you. i still haven't gotten used to that. anyway, i digress. it was a great training and a wonderful exercise of my creative juices. i recommend people from work who actually read this blog to enroll so they can learn something.